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The Twins wrap

They are always looking over my shoulder, usually standing one either side of me. One will slap me on the arm sayings "hey dad, how are you...drivel, drivel..." to distract me, while the other lifts the wallet out of my pocket, extracts 50 quid and slips it back unnoticed. I'm on to them. I put an electric contact buzzer in the wallet and when they tried to lift it out they got a shock. It gave me such a laugh to see the little b standing there fingers stuck to my wallet getting the electric chair treatment. You might call it convulsive laughter. This morning they crept up behind me all playfull, wearing rubber gloves and successfully pulled the same trick except this time when they put the wallet back they pressed it hard against my chest. I have been in shock since. Bloody twins, they good boys but they've repeated 6th grade 7 times now, which suits everybody concerned. Two 16 year old kids in a class of 30 10 year olds has its benefits. Teachers like them cos they keep the younger kids in order. Kids like them cos they keep teachers and bullies in order and provide excellent employment for ten year olds, who, as it happens, are very quick at deliveries or get aways on their street bikes and are still small enough to be bunked up through a bathroom window or a small hole in a factory fence or down the ventilation shaft of a local shop and 10 year olds are still innocent enough looking..well if you put some makeup over their facial tattoos... to pass customs without too much scrutiny at airports. I tell their parents, to universal aclaim at school heritage day, that the children need to get aquainted with our customs. Otherwise how will they ever grow up knowing how to smuggle? The twins like teachers cos they buy things that come from shops or airports.

Anyway the point is that the twins have stolen one of my ideas, art on clothes, so here's their first 6th grade painting on clothes effort. They are still hoping to impress Elton.

The Twins (from my comedy blog "The Builders from Outer Space")

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